Over the course of 2017 and leading into 2018, I have been on a consistent uphill battle in order to find out who I am independent of those around me. I have fought myself and my criticisms to slowly reclaim and develop my self-worth, in addition to finding who I am. I still have a way to go, however, I feel a steadily consistent growth and steps in the right direction. This year I will be 21 and cannot wait to see where I am in December 2018.
Photo by Zack Bazile
via Daily Prompt: Treat
The word of the day runs perfectly with what I am trying to do in 2018. Some may have taken the word of the day and described a treat they may love, but it served as a reminder to me that I need to a better job at treating myself. I do so much for others and give so much of myself to others. However, I need to do a better job at showing myself love and doing the little things to treat myself.
It doesn’t have to mean doing anything outrageous, it can be as simple as deep conditioning my hair or adding a face mask into my night routine. The little things add up.
via Daily Prompt: Conversation
This year, I want to become mentally healthier. I think a huge issue that I have is that I bottle everything up and don’t like to let anyone know when something is wrong. And one of my resolutions this year is to start coping with things in a better way than just sweeping it under the rug instead of finding someone I truly trust and sparking up a conversation.
I’m sure all consistent bloggers are reading this with an eye roll. However, blogging was an amazing form of an outlet for me six months ago when I gathered the guts to create it. Along the way, I have lost touch and lost sight of it and would love to continue with blogging. These are my new year’s resolutions:
…to become more mentally stable and in control of my emotions, in addition to understanding them.
…to become even more independent this year and build upon the foundation I have built in 2017.
…to have healthy coping mechanisms and surround myself with the best support system.
…to develop a stronger faith.
…to continue to find who I am, independent of others and outside expectations.
In 2018, I understand that it is not like I am walking through a magical portal where all my resolutions will happen. I know that I have to work to make things happen and I intend on my blog being an outlet for me as I take on the new-found challenges of this New Year.
We rode along in the car, just him and I. The open road ahead of us, windows rolled down, and the music blaring as we sang our favorite songs. Trumpets by Jason Derulo. That’s our song. Anything with a good beat and lyrics that mean something is eligible for the karaoke list on our car rides. But, something about Trumpets stuck out to us. We’ve been together almost 3 years now and we always sing that song together, where one of us is slacking on hitting the notes, the other picks up. Although we both love music and to sing and dance, that’s not what brought us together.
One of the best things about track is him.
It was a normal day of practice at the local gym, my coach and his coach were speaking as him and I warmed up in separate parts of the building. Ironically, our coaches were speaking about us before they eventually introduced us. I had heard of him, he had heard of me…yet, we just hadn’t met. Little did we know, all we need was a little push and guidance. We connected instantly and were together within two months or so. We have so much in common, yet are so different. We compliment each other, but at the same time balance each other out. Track is such a rigorous and relentless sport, but there have been so many positives. One of the best things about track is meeting new people, especially him. From that moment on in the gym…we have been interconnected and have shared something amazing. Our bond is something invaluable…
I thought of so many different ways to start this first post and what to even say…but, what I’ve learned over my 20 years of life is that 99% of the time, honesty is the best policy. Now, before you click away..understand that the 1% that I am referring to is when you are meeting your boyfriend or girlfriend’s mom for the first time and she asks, “do you like ______?”. Then, and only then, is it absolutely acceptable to lie. JK…
Everyone needs an outlet in life, writing brings me that…
But, really. I am not sure how to even start other than saying I have wanted to start up a blog for a while now and recently turning 20 called for a new chapter in my life. A little bit about me: I am a student-athlete at OSU and the last couple of years have been filled with blessings, but I’ve also struggled with balancing life and trying to find out who I am. One thing that I did learn is that writing is something I am very passionate about. I truly believe that everyone needs an outlet in life, something that brings them joy and or relief, comfort on hard days, writing is my outlet. It is hard for me to be open and vulnerable, so for now, anonymity is my best route. However, I plan to share about the typical collegiate athlete lifestyle and make things as personal and intimate as possible. I know that some day I will feel comfortable enough to share my story, but step one was putting myself out there.